Reality is still a dream

So here I am. I completed my first FULL day in Paris! My plane ride went off without a hitch, unlike most of the others from my program. I flew out of Toronto and there was absolutely no precipitation or anything. I sat alone on a window seat of the plane, so I had plenty of space to sleep. I ACTUALLY slept. Not a lot, but enough to get me through the day. Also.. when the plane took off, I felt such a surge of emotion that I started to tear up and cry a little and want to burst out laughing at the same time. I was so excited, nervous, anxious, you name it! But everything went so well! Then I met my program director in the cafe as planned and took a bus into the city to our places of residence. My foyer is pretty cool. I dig my room, even though it's a bit sparce.

Maureen, a girl from my building and I, spent the afternoon just walking around a little near our foyer. I tried French yogurt for the first time and it was GREAT.

Then the group of us that met up that day had our first dinner in Paris. It took us 10 minutes or so of wandering around to find someplace cheap and delicious sounding. We settled on some place near Luxemborg that I don't remember. I had an HUGE omlette au jambon et fromage, pomme frites et une salade. It's the best omlette I've ever had in my life.  It was fluffy and crispy and the cheese was gooey in all the right places and the ham/cheese combo gave the perfect amount of saltiness (I'm pretty sure it was cooked in butter because it had a wonderful creaminess to it as well). I wish I would have remembered to take a photo of it. Mais, c'est la vie! Also I had my first glass of wine here! It was a nice house white. Crisp and not too dry.

The next day I woke up after a miserable time sleeping (went to bed at 11, woke up at 3am. Couldn't fall back asleep and then when I did proceeded to wake up a ton of times) at 8:30.  My eyes were so bloodshot, even worse than they were from being on the plane! And then we all scurried over to Le Foyer International where our orientation was to occur. So we introduced ourselves and talked about basics such as phones and food, etc. Apres lunch (which we hurried over to a little grocery store to scavange some saucisson, yaourt, et chipsies (little potato chip like things) et un pomme (apple).  Then we went on a BOAT TOUR OF THE SEINE!! OMGGGG! Haha. I saw the Eiffel Tower, the Louve, Notre Dame, Musee d'Orsay, countless bridges and many other wonderful places I probably want to visit! It was freezing btw.. then we all got phones (i called my dad and proceeded to use up all my minutes and can't figure out how to put more on..). Then we went to a mall in Place d'Italy to a store called Tati that our program director suggested to us because it's cheap housewares (such as pots/pans, etc). Then there was a grocery store in the mall (weird, but whateves. It's a city). And i tried to use my credit card and it failed. So I left the store looking like an idiot. But my card does work because I can get money out of the ATM! After a little rest Elora, Ariana, Marianna and I went out to dinner at this cute Italian place and I had a fabulous salad ( the photo's on fb). After we walked Elora back. When returning to our foyer we stopped in a grocery store and had a wonderful freak out about how cheap all the wine is and how wonderful it is! And I found gluten free foods! YESS. And now I'm VERY tired and I apologize for the incoherentness. I'll fix it tomorrow. Bon soir!

Just Thinking Out Loud

Some of you may not know, but I am taking a global studies class over winter break for the minor. It begins pre-departure, then continues in-country and finishes upon my return back the US. I completed the first of 4 of the assignments I need to do before I leave. The topic was think of reasons why you chose your country and what your fears/excitement may be. I didn't want to get too personal on my first assignment, but one of the things I'm scared of is being alone. I think that's why I didn't want to let Jared go. I wanted to know that I will have someone who is close by (he'll be in London next semester) who loves me and will support me. I didn't want to have the full extent of homesickness that I know I will experience going over without anyone.

Through all my rant: I thank everyone who loves me for their support. My mother and father who although hesitant to let me go, allowed me to do this because I've dreamed of it for so long. My brother who has gone through so much with his illness the past year. I hope you get better and are able to come visit me! My grandparents, aunts and uncles who shared all their oversea stories and given me extra advice and help me to prepare for the change. My girlfriends who are always there for me when I need them most and can share anything with. All the guys from that suite in Hughes and 10 Edwards who told me that I was there friend too, not just Jared's girlfriend. The Mather guys whom I just had the pleasure of meeting this semester. They opened their doors and hearts to me, the weird little awkward girl that likes to dance and talk about unicorns. Everyone else at school whom I got to know through classes that allowed me to see that I can be friends with Bio majors and that there are people that can work together and play together (we ARE going to open a biotech company one day.. don't you forget it Samara and Mike)! You are all so fantastic and I will be thinking about you as I'm flying over the Atlantic Ocean.  I wish those who will be leaving college and graduating next semester have a wonderful time and I know all of you will do wonderful things with your life. You will all find happiness, love and prosperity. I'm going to remember all the wonderful memories we had whether short or long. I treasure my time with all of you and although I may not have gotten as close with some, I still thank you for the time you spent with me. And those who did take a chance on getting to know me better, I thank you even more. You witnessed the crazy, vulnerable person that hides beneath the cheery exterior and that I'm just looking to be accepted somewhere.  Thank you for accepting me. Thank you for loving me.

(I apologize. This is much longer than intended!)

Contemplating the upcoming adventure and the past year

As you may know, I will be going to Paris soon for study abroad. If you have ever talked to me for more than five minutes, you discover that this is a dream that I have wanted to live out since I was thirteen. I can't believe I'm actually going to do this. I can't believe I'm actually going there. This feels like a dream and that I'm going to wake up any moment, just to find out I'm in Binghamton late for class. 

I've had a rough past semester. Three of my house mates turned out to be horrible people. I won't go into the specifics, but let's just say we had a difference of opinion in many ways. They are the people who gave me the strength to do this. In a weird way, I thank them for being cruel and misleading. Through my disdain for them I was given the ability to forge through and do something I need. Furthermore, I recently became single after being in a two year relationship. It was really hard at first, because even though I knew it would happen, I was still unprepared for the change. But I'm okay now. Things will work out and I'm excited to be on my own and do things for myself. A change of scenery and a semester of enjoyment is what I deserve. I have worked incredibly hard for the past two and a half years as a cell and molecular biology student. I try to do well in school and study for hours to get good grades. Although I enjoy biology, I have other passions as well. I hope to be able to live them out this semester. 

I am sorry to those I will leave behind, both old and new friends. It's rather cruel that this past semester would be the one that I discovered so many new and amazing people, only to leave them behind. And the vast majority are graduating next semester, so I probably won't see them again. I want you to know that I love you and will cherish the time we had together. Thank you for being my friend, I truly appreciate it. 

The time is getting closer everyday until I leave and I keep getting more and more excited. I keep trying to mentally prepare myself, but I just can't. I'm trying not to freak out, but that's what's starting to happen. At first I was slightly terrified to be alone in an unknown country. But as I met people in my program and talked to my friends who previously studied abroad, I've calmed down a little. I will be living my dream, experiencing a new world and hopefully discover a new side of myself.